How to Use "But" to Create a Stronger Story Concept

The most important and most difficult part of writing any story is developing its premise or concept. Most films, television shows, and novels that fail do so because their premise was not developed deeply, originally or dramatically enough. I want to show you one simple technique to help you better develop your story concepts.

Consider this example of a simple story premise:

An ambitious teen desires to become a world class ballerina, BUT she weighs 300 pounds.

The first half of this premise statement conveys the protagonist’s goal, while the second half of the statement contains her main obstacle or problem. The BUT that joins these two statements makes it dramatically (and grammatically) clear that these two ideas are in great conflict. The “but” in this statement helps the writer (and any reader of it) focus on this big conflict or contradiction.

Following is a more complex example of a story premise, for the classic novel The Prisoner of Zenda by Anthony Hope:

To save the life of a kidnapped and weak king, a heroic and honourable English gentleman, who looks exactly like the king, impersonates him BUT falls madly in love with the king’s fiancé, a courageous princess.

The first half of this premise again conveys the protagonist’s main goal, while the second half states the great complication, twist and conflict against that goal. That is, while impersonating the king he wishes to save and support, the Englishman falls madly in love with the king’s fiancé. The English gentleman is now in a terrible conflict between his two goals – which is made dramatically clear by the word “BUT”.

To emphasize my point, this “BUT” clearly shows that the protagonist is in a terrible dilemma that he has to struggle with and resolve during the story. His first big honourable goal is to save the king, but an ironic related consequence of him struggling to attain this goal is his second mutually exclusive BUT goal and problem: Wanting to love and marry the princess who is engaged to the king he is rescuing.

The use of BUT in a premise statement like this thereby very clearly focuses and essentializes in the writer’s mind the contradictory and terrible internal conflict of the Englishman: That he is torn between his honour to save the king and his love for and desire to have the princess for himself. Because the Englishman can’t attain both goals this premise is intriguing and dramatic. It is the word “but” that makes this especially clear.

The protagonist having an internal conflict also makes this a more layered and emotional story. Many writers could write a fine adventure story about an Englishman saving a king from his kidnappers, which is the main plot line of this novel and film. But that is just a one-layer story of action and intrigue.

By adding the second layer of the heroes’ internal conflict, The Prisoner of Zenda is now also a drama and a love story. That is, it is now a story interesting to a wider audience, and this in part explains why The Prisoner of Zenda is so popular and considered a novel and film classic.

As a creative exercise, ask yourself: What are the great dramatic possibilities in this premise? How would I write this story?

And then read the novel or watch the classic 1937 film adaptation with Ronald Colman to see if you were right. Anthony Hope really milked this layered story concept to great emotional effect.

Not every story concept needs or benefits from a BUT in it, but such a simple device can really help a writer refine, develop, and focus his or her story.

So, dear writer, when you are developing the central conflict of your next story ask yourself how you can join the two key ideas of your central conflict statement with the word BUT to increase the conflict, layers, and drama of your story.

No “BUTS”! Please think about that….

Concept truly is king. And having a strong, layered central conflict to your story is the single best way for you to write a good story and so to stride closer to your dream career.

Stories are ideas in action!

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